The biggest betrayal of them all

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Every morning I wake up and after taking a bath and getting dressed, I look into the mirror. For the most part, I am always pleased with what I see. I am happy with the person looking back at me. Yes, there are the occasional off days when my hair is not the way I want it, or I have pimples in my face. On these mornings, I usually feel less than attractive and not very confident at all. But when I usually look into the mirror, I am pleased with what I see. I do not wear any make-up, but I make sure I look good. I plan my outfits each day. My shoes and clothes are all that which I love, not that which I think others will love. Everything I do is for me, not for others. I do not wish to gain their approval; I do it to make myself happy.

So, when someone tells you that you should change something about yourself, what do you do? It could be a small request like your hair colour. It could be a bigger request like losing weight. Or it could be changing the way you dress. Now you see, to me, there are really no small or big requests when it comes to changing who you are or who you want to be. There are no small requests when you are asked to be that which you are not. Because, changing something like your hair colour or the way you dress, because someone else does not like who you are now, is major. It starts off with those ‘little’ things. And before you know it, you have changed your whole being.

I have not always been this confidant. Growing up, it was not easy. I made some choices that others did not like. I made some choices that made others feel uncomfortable. Sometimes, I even questioned those choices, doubted them. But you see, their comfort was not something that concerned me. I had to be comfortable with being me, my authentic self, the person I wanted to be and not the person others wanted me to be. It has been a journey getting to where I am. So now, when someone tells me ‘why don’t you do this instead of that?’ and they refer to my appearance, I may become overly dramatic, but I do this because it angers me. I am La-Toya Christian Stone. I speak my mind. I do not shy away from who I am. I could never betray myself like that. Every hair follicle on my head is as it should be. Today it might be black, next month it could be red. That does not mean I have an identity crisis. It simply means I am comfortable being whoever I want to be. Whoever I want to be, not who others want me to be.

 I am content with who I am, inside and outside. Yes, there is always room for improvement; this comes with lessons learned, the journey we undertake. But right now, I am happy. I will not change who I am in order to make others happy. I will not alter that which I love so much, in order for another to show me love. I cannot betray myself like that.

Do not betray who you are in order to please another.  Once you change one thing, another change will soon follow. Are you prepared for that?

Stay true to who you are. Some will love you for it, others will hate you, but at least you have not betrayed yourself. That is the biggest betrayal of them all.

Take Care

Miss Stone

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