Let the drama go!

Women are full of drama. Yes I said it. We are full of drama. And sometimes, it is so unnecessary.

A few months ago, a Coloured girl started working here. I had seen her around only a few times prior to her working here, so we had never spoken to one another. But very quickly, I picked up on one thing: She did not like me. Now this puzzled me. We had never even said hello to one another, we had never had a conversation and we were never in the same company, so what was her dislike towards me based on? I thought maybe I was overreacting and that with time, we would get along, but with each passing day, it became clearer to me. She just did not like me. She would walk in and greet my colleague (who sits next to me) by name and not greet me. She almost walked me over one day in the passage. It was one thing after the other. So when all these little ‘mishaps’ started taking place, my claws came out too. I thought, I can do a bit better than her. And so I did. The nasty look here, the snide remark there, it all became a norm to me. Until one day it hit me. I was stooping to her level. All this was beneath me.

Yes, not everyone can like me. I do not like everyone I came across in life, so how could I expect everyone to like me? What bothered me though was the fact that I had seen this happen more often than I would have liked to, especially with Coloured women. We just do not like each other. There may be no apparent reason. The reason may be rather superficial. But we just do not like each other. And although the opinion of one girl who has no importance in my life does not shatter me, it does make me think. If she does not like me, and I do not like her and another girl (also for some silly reason) and that girl in turn does not like another, who does not like someone else, it soon becomes a circle. And when you look at it, this circle is rather large. A circle of women who hate on one another for no reason or for reasons that have long been forgotten. A circle of women who are jealous of one another. A circle of women who bad mouth each other and spread vicious rumours. A circle of women who break each other down without even realizing it.

We often get upset when men call us drama queens. We are quick to sulk and have our lips hang on the floor when the opposite sex make jokes of us and how petty we can be. We raise our voices when they point out how shallow we are at times. But sadly, it is all true. We want men to respect us, but we have no respect for each other. We want men to love us, flaws and all, but we do not love ourselves. I am not saying we have to like every woman we meet, but we do not have to hate on them either. We are so much more than that.

As a woman, I walk with my head held high. I cannot be crushed by every individual who dislikes me. I have no control over others and their feelings. I can however, control that which I feel towards others. I will not like everyone I come across, this is a given. But I do not have to act out of character in order to prove a point. I do not have to prove a point to anyone. Remember, charity begins at home and it is never too late to make that circle smaller. It all starts with you and your attitude towards others.

Now, I come to work and I have learned to mind my own business. I try by all means to block out negativity. I will not allow myself to become entangled in bitterness and ugliness and by doing that, I prevent the circle from growing even further.

Ladies, we need to be proud to be called Women. We need to stand tall and own it. We need to walk with pride and smile like the world needs it to spin on its axis. We are Women. Strong and fierce. We are like no other and it is time we realized it and started acting accordingly. Hating on one another will do nothing for us. We cannot allow it to consume us. 

So let go of the pettiness. Let go of the hate. Let the drama go. 

Look after each other. Look out for one another.

Take Care

Miss Stone